Mind Over Manners

The Centurion meeting had ended, as well as it could have, Christian supposed. How else could he have expected it to end? Rowan was still in a state of distress and he was taking Carter's sister on a quest. It was a loaded meeting to walk into. When he'd entered, he figured he'd still have one partner to count on. No matter the bad news, no matter the odds. His perspective was changing.

The work he'd been doing lately, all of the time and effort, it was addicting. Despite the dramatic effects, the exhaustion, the lack of time, he couldn't help but always look forward to the next thing. He'd lost hours of sleep looking for a map with Black Creek. Sifting through dozens of maps of the entire United States took so long, and still, he couldn't stop. When he worked, he didn't think of his feelings. All of the things he wouldn't dare tell another soul. He didn't think about his mom. He didn't think of his own self-disappointment. He didn't think of Crystal.

He'd been at a normal level of happiness lately. But, it didn't change that having so much work to do was something he clung to. It was special. He could be somebody. He could matter to real, breathing people.

He'd ushered Corinne to walk back to the barracks with him. The second they were in New Rome, cleared from the other Centurions, he spoke. "What the hell was that? I thought you were raised in a manor, not a barn." Christian's words came out in less of a harsh tone, but more a disappointed one.

Coffee had been something interesting. Rinne had never really tried it before. There were a few times, but usually she wasn't a huge fan and pushed it away. Today she managed to down the whole cup and even went for a second one in the middle of the meeting. The daughter of Chione could feel the energy in her body and her mind was on high alert. She felt like she was more awake than she had been previously.

Corinne was walking beside Christian as they headed back towards the barracks. She began to pull the candy he had given her out of her pick and she was fiddling around with the box trying to open it. She wasn't the most talented at things like this. Boxes weren't new at all to her, but little tiny ones that were harder to open were a bit of a challenge.

The girl finally got it open when she heard Christian's comment and the smile on her face had wiped off by the time she looked over to him. She stopped and didn't take another step forward. "I wasn't raised in either actually, but that's not the point." Rinne replied.

What was she supposed to say to him? Corinne hadn't see a lot of Christian recently. He was a fairly busy centurion, but so was she. But she had seen less of him since he left for that quest with Carter and Sophia Virgo. He spent more time with Rowan, the other second cohort centurion. He spent time on the quest he was about to go on with Sophia Virgo. It just felt like Christian wasn't really there since the night they "sneaked" out together to check out the spot Lennie mentioned.

Rinne had felt the rejection by this point. But she still assumed that was to happen if you sinned. Nothing good came out of sinning. But if she already sinned and was in punishment, why not just disregard the rules then? Why would the rules matter anymore?

"It was nothing, just careless thinking." Corinne said softly, a little regretful of her earlier actions. She just was at a loss. It was hard to deal with the fact she probably made her father roll in his grave. It was hard to deal with the fact that she had basically been rejected. It was hard not to see him much anymore. So maybe even if it were a negative reaction, he was still spending a little bit of time with her.

Christian watched her actions. It was still always so hard to read Corinne. He remembered when he'd first met her. She was like a lost puppy, she didn't understand anything. He'd held her hand the whole way, but she wasn't as light-hearted as she was back then. Things were different.

"Once tomorrow morning hits, I'm gone. Lennie's gone. You know what happens out there." Christian hated to make her relive her first life so many times. But she knew, better than anyone, just how bad things could get outside of the safety New Rome offered. She'd lost two people she cared enough to go on a quest with. Christian didn't know how he'd live if something happened to Lennie, or even Sophia or Valerie under his watch. He'd take that fall for any one of them.

"I don't know what happened with you and whatever guy... or, girl, I guess. I don't know. But I need you here." Christian insisted. "And everyone here needs you too. We can't square anything away without you. You need to tell me that the Corinne I knew when I was on painkillers is still here."

The words "you know what happens out there" continued to circle in her mind. It was true she knew. If she could have picked who lived and who died, she would have picked herself to die. She hated the fact that she had no control over it. By rights they all should have died due to the extremes of the conditions out there. But even now, Corinne was alive and on this whole entire planet, she had found a familiar face. Seeing Netha was one of the greatest things she would experience in her lifetime. To find one thing that hasn't changed. One being that is still here. It was a miracle. Corinne began to tear up a little at the thought and as one tear streamed down her face she quickly wiped it away.

"I haven't seen him since the first time I met him. I just haven't felt up to it." Rinne said a pain and heavy weight starting to settle in on her chest. What was she supposed to say or do? Corinne tried with all her might in the times she wasn't and was around Christian just to deny any feeling that she had residing in her heart. It was for the best. Corinne wasn't seen that way and she knew it. Didn't make it hurt any less though. If anything knowing she was the one the mess that up, that hurt the worst.

"I have been here each time you go on a quest. Except the one I went on with you. I will continue to do so. You don't have to worry about the cohort." The brunette said softly. He didn't have to. It was possible with him gone she could try to forget about any feeling that was left inside her.

It seemed like she understood what he was saying. It was as though the girl in the meeting and the girl outside with him were two entirely different people. It wasn't good for his emotions. What had been anger had turned into uncertainty. There was simply silence between the two for a long pause.

"I get it." He said, finally. "My family is gone too." He dug into the left pocket of his pants, he'd carried around the pocket watch for weeks now, after getting it repaired. It probably wasn't doing her any good to think that it was gone forever. He reached his hand out, with the pocket watch in it, for her to take.

"I was waiting for the right time to give it back to you." He said. He was almost positive that night would have been the right time, then things changed so heavily so quickly. "Better safe than sorry." He wasn't entirely certain now was the best time, but still, he might not make it back. There was always that chance.

Corinne stayed silent for awhile. There wasn't much to say to each other. She didn't want to disappoint him more than she already had. Rinne took a deep breath in trying to keep her emotions settled. It wasn't very good to let people see your emotions, especially as a girl. That was what she was taught. You were just supposed to make sure everything would be okay and carry on. She knew that wasn't how the world was now, but it was just so hard to get rid of old habits like that.

She heard him speak. What followed after was when he pulled out something from his pocket. She reached her hand out and took what he had. When she felt it she knew exactly what it was. Corinne couldn't believe what she was seeing. She thought she had lost it months ago. Corinne looked back up at Christian and this time she couldn't help but have the tears well up. It was the one piece she had left of her father. The piece she thought she had lost forever. The tears began to spill over.

Rinne could feel the mix of emotions circle inside of her. She could finally breathe better knowing she had the pocket watch again, but yet this was just another thing he did to go above and beyond for her. He had helped her when she knew nothing, he was always there, but now it felt like he wasn't. She knew eventually stuff like that ceased to be, but it was hard. The daughter of Chione as much as she'd hate to admit it, she had attachment issues.

"Thank you. This means a lot to me." Corinne said softly her voice getting shaky. She put the pocket watch away and she grabbed his slowly moved her hand towards his and took it in hers gently. He was leaving on a quest soon. No one knew if he'd come back again. "Christian, I need to tell you something in case I never get another chance to say it to you."